Is it okay to spy on your spouse? You think you see signs of an unfaithful spouse. It is often a very strong need to know whether or not your spouse is unfaithful and exactly what kind of cheating is taking place. The need to spy on your spouse can be powerful and there are several reasons why. Here’s four:
1. The ability to trust is a huge reason, not the ability to trust your partner, but being able to trust yourself. You have probably sensed something different or noticed your partners behavior changing for a while. You may have even confronted your unfaithful husband or wife and you were met with denial. It is impossible to start surviving infidelity in your relationship when your still in the denial phase.
This will create a major problem because you inner voice is screaming, The pieces don’t fit! I don’t believe it! To deny your gut feeling, which knows the truth, will create serious inner turmoil. When the truth as you suspect it is confirmed, you can take a cleansing breath and at least know that you can trust yourself. You are not losing your mind. Spying is a way to prove what your gut has been telling you and allows you to feel confident in listening to your gut feelings.
2. When you spy on your spouse it can help you feel more connected to them when they seem to be moving away. It is a way of still having contact and a connection to your spouse who was once well known. Isn’t it comparable to the game of hide-and-seek we used to play as children? Sometimes there, sometimes gone. At least it’s a game and a game consists of some form of contact, some involvement. You want to still be connected and are looking for some way to maintain contact.
3. Spying on your significant other may be an honest attempt to save your marriage. You have to get to the bottom of it. You feel as though pieces of the puzzle do not fit. You know deep down inside that there is a breach in your relationship. You need to find out what the brick wall is. You are not willing to stand by and wait. You are a person who takes action. You want some form of movement. You have to move forward in your marriage. You want to continue with your life. It is very hard to stay sane when there is a big secret that no one is talking about. You want to know what is real, be able to face it head on, deal with it and then be free of it. If necessary, you will have to be able to move on and consider life after divorce.
4. Being able to see signs of an unfaithful spouse most often means secrets. A secret takes a ton of work to keep! Keeping one day in and day out has a very powerful impact. It becomes the proverbial elephant in the middle of the room that no one dares to mention. People go the the extreme to try to ignore it, but it is still there. Emotionally, you can’t miss it. Secrets are a drain.
If the secret persists, its impact is felt in subtle but insidious ways. You can become physically ill, sometime seriously so. It can make people depressed. People begin doing things that seem a little crazy. Children start acting out, stop achieving, become listless or exhibit a bunch of other symptoms. Children, or the next generation, often carry the emotional load. You want to spy because you can’t have the secret lingering in your house any longer. You have to find out the truth. You want to feel the freeing power of the exposed secret and the opportunity it offers for healing, resolution, a rich relationship and a productive life.
If your gut is telling you that your spouse is cheating on you I would strongly recommend you read my How To Catch A Cheating Spouse Review.